Broken dreams

Growing up the only dream i ever had was simple, it was to get married, have 4-6 kids and raise them in a healthy and happy home.
Well i got married a month after i turned 17, i was just a junior in high school, Jade was born just 5 months later. Thirteen months after that Starla was born, four years and one month later a long came Piper, two years and three months later Anakin was born. Nine days after that i turned 25, in 8 short years i got everything i ever wanted. I had four wonderful amazing children and a husband who i loved more than life itself. My life was perfect, i had my dream.
All that was left was to raise my babies and enjoy the little things like watching them grow, celebrating 25th and 50th wedding anniversaries. I was amazed and astonished everyday at how lucky and blessed my life was. I had so much more than any one person deserved. Two years after my dream had been completed by my sons birth, it was all ripped away. My perfect little world was gone. I did everything i could to fix it, i held on as hard as i could for long as i could, until the day i realized i was literally killing myself. I was so far gone that i just about gave up on everything. I never thought i would dream again, i really believed since my one dream in life was gone, that i had nothing else to look forward to. I fell apart on night, i may have mentioned some of this on here before. I don't remember for sure.
Since that night i have slowly been healing, i still take a step back every now & then, where i miss that life so much it hurts, but i can feel myself get stronger everyday. I have realized now, that some dreams are meant to be broken, we are who we are because of what we have been through.
I have realized new dreams are possible. It will be a little different and I'm sure a part of me will always miss the dream and life i had, but i am looking forward to the new dream of making something of my life. Of pulling through this and building a life for me and my kids. Of some day meeting someone & falling in love and having someone love me in return. Of being married again & celebrating those anniversaries. Ive always been a dreamer and no matter what Ive been through i still am.