Wow

Well surprisingly writing out that post earlier helped me some. I was able to forget about the things I didn't want to think about for awhile. I never realized writing it out would help so much. So there may end up being alot more rambling on here that wont make sense until I work through what I am trying to get past. I was able to make supper and fold some clothes and read for awhile and cut Anakins hair and give him a bath all without thinking about the thoughts that have been plaguing me lately. Even now its just a thought or worry here and there, not like earlier when they were to the they felt like they running on high speed non stop and enough to make me want to cry. I feel alot more at peace and semi-happy then I have in the last couple of days. I probably really sound like a fruitcake here! There are alot of scary what ifs, that I need to figure out how to accept the possibility of. And all I can hope is that they never come to be.